When a bookseller became the better sports broadcaster


Hallelujah! It’s finally happened! No, I’m not getting married – that would be a miracle, let’s face it – no, finally there was swearing in sport and the commentators did not apologise for it.

Were these commentators working for Sky Sports? BT Sports? BBC, ITV, EPSN,  or Eurosport?

No! It was Amazon.  Amazon bloody Prime would you believe?

Many things bug me about football coverage.  Mostly that Sky Sports are crap at covering the Scottish game and that BT Sports cover it so well so, we can all take from that, that it’s not that bloody hard to do!

One thing that really bugs me is when someone in the crowd at a match being covered by the TV says something like ‘Hey you, you’re fucking useless!’ and this is picked up by the microphones, which the TV companies have put there, leading to an almost immediate apology from the commentators.  ‘Oh we’re sorry if you heard any foul language there’.

NO, NO! Stop fucking apologising! If people watching at home are offended by swearing at the football then stop fucking watching it! Go to a match in a ground and no one, absolutely no one will apologise to you if there is swearing.  Not a steward, not a police person, not the club chairman and certainly not the person who swore.

I fucking defend my right to say ‘fucking get in aw aboot them Hibs, ya daft bastards’ without anyone apologising for it.  If someone wants to shout FUCK OFF LINESMAN YA BASTARDING DICK then fire away! Do it! Stand up and bellow it from the bottom of your lungs.  Let the linesman know all about it.  Let fans all around know about it and let the people at home know about it.  It is amazing!

Just don’t think about some commentator (who almost certainly uses these words) apologising for you telling the world what you think of the linesman.

It’s absolute madness to be apologising for it.  Who has seen through the madness? Yes, Amazon.  Amazon which started life flogging books online in 1994.  How have they seen through it? They just don’t apologise for it.  Simple.

I first sort of noticed it at the beginning of the US Open (tennis).  Nick Kyrgios (the controversial Australian player) had done a wee ‘fuck’ or two which alerted me and I listened to the commentators waiting on the apology.  Nope! It didn’t come.  All they said was that he’d dropped a couple of f-bombs.

Lap of the living room for me.  Wahey! Someone swore in sport and no one was mad enough to apologise for it.

A couple of days later and the Cypriot, Marcos Baghdatis dropped a couple and got a row from the umpire for it, to which he simply replied it was normal in his house, but no apology from the commentators.

Tonight.  Tonight was sublime.  Kyrgios was f-bombing all over the shop and no commentator uttered one word of apology.  It was beautiful.  If only we had this in football.  If only Sky and BT didn’t want to kill the atmosphere of the game.  Give Amazon Prime all the football in the United Kingdom!

The message is really simple;